From the Slightly Skewed Mind of Ben Chosa Jr.

January 4, 2010

Here I sit facing a brand new year having survived a rather tumultuous 2009; although, I wouldn't be honest if I said that the last 365 days weren't both fun and maddening in equal measures. The best part of the year was beginning it with a job; I just didn't finish the year with the same job. This year also marked another trip to segregation. Another new lawyer, and another new angle to take to the courts. Thankfully nobody close to me died, but I'm worried and angry at the hot mess my sister has become. 2009 was the year that I made the best financial decisions of my life, and those who know me best will understand the earth-shattering importance of that. But before I get into that I want to get around to replying to some of the comments from those who have taken the time and effort to observe upon my rather drab and dreary world. Now, my world is that much less so (Is that even a sentence?).

On November 28 2009 anonymous said. . .

" Ani I have no training in art, but I do think that your drawing is very good. I found your blog, somewhat by accident and have read your post with some interest. It would be wrong for me to make judgements regarding your life, but from my perspective, I believe that reality and truth is often the midpoint between the perception of two people. It is good that you are trying to take responsibility for your actions. I hope that you will find peace in your life.”

...To which I say:

I am pleased that you found my blog. This would seem to be a case study in serendipity, and I am a great believer in "happy accidents." Since I have put my life on display I am inviting one and all to not only rubberneck at this car crash I call my Life, but to judge and make both jest and comment in equal portions. To paraphrase Napoleon, "Truth is just a fairy-tale agreed upon." I don't know about truth other than I can let everyone see my life not from my perspective alone, but from the mountain of documents that have been generated in the wake of my passing. It seems that everywhere I've been, loads of records and test results and comments from perfect strangers have been compiled and filed. Whether it was Lutheran Social Services, the Wisconsin Department of Corrections, or some drug treatment hospital, l did not pass through life very quietly. That's okay with me; after all, I have been known to have, at best, only a nodding acquaintance with the truth, so it is fortunate that one doesn't have to take just my word on things. While not always being prompt with taking responsibility I think I wouldn’t be abusing the truth to say that I usually own up to the messes that I make. I do enjoy being recognized for the effort. As for finding peace in my life I think that I’ll settle for having some fun, and laughing a lot. Currently that doesn't seem too far beyond me.

On that I will close and try to get this in the mail and posted.

Ani